To stay off topic, we call them peacocks for males and peahens for females. Thinking about it a little more, bringing in examples of other organisms children will know or learn about gives them a larger context for many things and can establish relevance.
I think BALANCE is the key…. Notice when an extra effort is made for a special event (Wow… you clean up nice!). Or even when one gets a new hair style (Who knew that a hair cut could accent your pretty face?). My kids, now grown, were always complimented on their appearance – I had to point out their generous, loving natures- , latest volunteer work, good grades, good teamship- to others, so they had other things to talk about than the way they looked.
So…your daughter asked you if you thought she was pretty, and you refused to answer, but took her to the zoo to tell her that it wasn’t important?
I’m guessing that’s going to cause a few years of therapy when she is old enough to process that her own mother seemed to not think she was pretty.
I appreciate that your thoughts made me think as well–about both my past behaviors and my future behaviors. But something that I thought while reading the article is that I speak to little boys in the same way! I always tell them how cute they are, and how much I like their hair/eyes/clothes/way they talk. Would your point of view on this be that we shouldn’t approach any children this way? Or just girls?
[tags: Stress Anger Psychology Essays]
That is just one of the many ways adults reinforce stereo types and condescend to children. I recently stopped asking or guessing childrens ages. It just isnt important but we are always making it a subject of conversation. Adults certainly would feel uncomfortable talking about out age and its effects on health and development. Why do we do this with kids? I remember as a child how adults often exaggerate enthusiasm it just made me think they wernt being very real.
[tags: Health Anger Emotions Essays]
I think these girls need a balance of both. When I was growing up my daddy told me every day that I was beautiful. He still does. He told me I was beautiful when I woke up in the morning, if I was dressed up, and if I ran in from the backyard with my “grass, dirt, and worm salad”! I loved dresses and dolls and barbies and I loved riding bikes with my brothers and yes I loved mud like a little pig. Mud and I were best friends. However, I was not allowed to 1) paint my nails 2) wear any sort of make up 3) dye my hair 4) listen to indecent music 5) watch any TV shows besides PBS or Veggie Tales.
[tags: woman and anger, interactions]
The funny thing is, my next question for my peers or for those sweet little ones who are so adorable is “So what are you up to?”. We talk about lots of things. The thing is in most of my conversations, dresses and make up and nails are really not the topic of conversation. I have had many conversations with little girls about books, bugs, animals, space, the ocean, singing, art, reading, writing etc.